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Sep 2, 2021
2 min

Roller-coaster Emotions

Question: From the onset of the Covid-19 crisis our kids have experienced a roller-coaster of emotions—fearful, sad, anxious, angry, depressed–and it’s been much more pronounced than usual. While we’re trying to manage our own emotions, are there some ways that we can do a better job of heling them manage theirs, and experience God’s presence? You’re in good company. In the past few months I’ve heard from many parents who feel overwhelmed with how to manage their own emotio

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Apr 1, 2021
3 min

Crushing Expectations

Question Our 14-year-old son is obsessed with being the best and can be devastated by even small mistakes and setbacks which often lead him to quit. We fear that if we can't help him with this now, it will just become worse as he gets older. Any ideas? Answer Young people face tremendous external pressures to be the best, to be all that they can be which often gets translated into having to be better than everyone else. In the athletic world being number two means that you

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Jan 1, 2021
2 min

Temper Tantrums Again

Question With all of the changes, interruptions and instability our son and daughter have experienced over the past several months, they’ve struggled a lot more with uncharacteristic outbursts of anger that sound a lot like the temper tantrums when they were young. Other parents in our home group have noticed similar problems. Any suggestions? Answer Whenever you are faced with someone who is expressing anger the healthiest first response is to STOP or pause, LOOK & LISTEN,

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Mar 21, 2020
1 min

Bruce Moose and the What-ifs

This is a motion video rendition of “Bruce Moose and the What-Ifs” by Gary J. Oliver & H. Norman Wright. This engaging book for children addresses issues of worry and anxiety. Concerns and fears are the “what-ifs” that whisper in our ears and lead us to miss out on new experiences or else worry about what might happen. Download the Video for Off-line viewing (182MB) Read by Tony J. Elliot. Illustrations by Sharon Dahl. ©1996 – Gary J. Oliver & H. Norman Wright Uploaded with P

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Sep 24, 2019
2 min

Seasonal Depression

Question Every year during winter my wife becomes extremely emotional and depressed. The only reason I can figure is that she’s affected by the lack of sun and the dreary days and weather. Would that be true? Is there something I can do to help her? Answer At the outset, it’s important for you to understand that what she is experiencing is real and is experienced by many other people. Your wife is probably suffering from Seasonal Affective Disorder Syndrome or SADS. For sever

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Apr 24, 2019
3 min

Dreaming

Question I often have dreams about being unfaithful to my husband. They usually involve a faceless “mystery man” who’s perfect in every way. He’s kind, loving, gentle, and attentive to my feelings and needs. I haven’t told my husband about the dreams. How can I? Should I? Please help. Answer We can’t control what we dream, but we can control what we do about our dreams. Several years ago, a friend jokingly gave me a book with 10,000 different dream interpretations. Whenever I

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Apr 12, 2019
2 min

How To Forgive Hurt

Question Our teenage son was rejected by several of his friends and his hurt has turned into a bitterness and hatred that concerns us. We’ve encouraged him to forgive them and move on but he says he can’t. How can we help him? Answer No matter how old we are it’s easy for rejection to produce hurt which can easily turn into bitterness, resentment, and anger. The more we focus on how we were wronged the worse it gets and the harder it is to let go of it. Paula Reinhardt des

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Jan 24, 2019
2 min

How to Prepare Children for Moving

Question We’re preparing for a major move from the only home our three kids have known. At 6, 8 and 11 they’re already experiencing a range of painful emotions. We’ve heard some horror stories from parents who got moving wrong. How can we get it right? Answer Moving involves changes, very real losses and can create a crisis for children and adults. Moving produces disorientation, disequilibrium, and uncertainty. The world as they’ve know it is being turned upside down. A

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Dec 11, 2018
2 min

Managing Adolescent Withdrawal

Question Our teenage son has become more withdrawn and isolated in the past few months. Is this normal? Is it something to be concerned about? How can we help? Answer Wise parents are always on the lookout for sustained changes in the behaviors of their children, especially when those behaviors include withdrawal and/or isolation. Withdrawal and isolation has become even more common as there has been a significant decline in social connectedness throughout our society and

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Dec 1, 2018
3 min

Shy Child

Question Our 10-year-old daughter is painfully shy around others. She’s quiet but still a lot of fun at home with us and her two younger brothers, but at church she’s very shy and has a hard time making new friends, and her teachers tell me she’s the same at school. She sometimes looks away when adults try to speak to her, any gentle nudges from her dad and I to “join in the fun” cause her to retreat further. She's been this way since she was small, but I thought she might

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Oct 24, 2018
2 min

Dealing with Temper Tantrums

Question Our youngest daughter is strong-willed and throws temper tantrums whenever she doesn’t get her way. We’ve talked to other parents but still aren’t sure what to do. Any suggestions? Answer You’ve rushed into Wal-Mart for a few things and pass the Sponge Bob Bubble Bath as you check-out. Your little gal reaches out to grab it, you move her hand away and say no. Game on—the power struggle has begun. Temper tantrums can first appear during a child’s second year, peak

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Oct 11, 2018
2 min

How to Parent When Angry

Question As my kids have become teenagers our whole family has noticed that when one of the kids disobeys or mouths off I increasingly “lose it” and react with anger and sarcasm. I’m not proud of that and need to make some changes. Any suggestions? Answer At the outset it’s essential that you gain a better understanding of the emotion of anger. Anger is the most powerful and the second most frequently mentioned emotion in the Bible and the majority of biblical references t

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Aug 11, 2018
4 min

Negative Attitudes

Question I often overhear my two daughters criticizing other people. I think they're picking it up from other kids at school, but I want them to see the positive instead of the negative in other people. Any suggestions? Answer According to Webster’s dictionary being critical can mean anything from “inclined to criticize severely and unfavorably” to “exercising or involving careful judgment or judicious evaluation.” The word criticism has a wide range of meanings from someth

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Jun 23, 2018
2 min

Dealing with Anger in Your Child

Question I think that our three-year-old daughter is the stereotypical angry child. When she doesn’t get what she wants at the grocery store she shouts, screams, kicks, holds her breath, and becomes the center of attention. It’s embarrassing and frustrating and usually pushes our anger buttons which just makes things worse. Any suggestions? Answer Your “precious little girl” is having a classic “temper tantrum” which is not uncommon at her age. They usually last as long a

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Jun 11, 2018
3 min

After Divorce

Question My husband and I divorced a little more than a year ago. The kids live with me and visit their dad (and his new wife of three months) every other weekend; and their dad makes an effort to be a part of their lives. Our 8-year-old daughter seems to be adjusting OK, but our 10-year-old son is like a new person. Once fun-loving, he's withdrawn and quiet now. I thought this would just be a phase for him, but he doesn't seem to be coming out of it. How can I help my son? A

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Aug 23, 2017
2 min

Parenting through Change and Loss

Question We have a son and daughter, ages 10 and 7, and over the past two years we’ve experienced some significant changes and losses including moving to a different state, the death of a beloved family pet and my wife’s diagnosis of fibromyalgia—a lot of changes in a short time. How can we help our kids deal with these changes and losses in healthy ways? Answer Losses can range from a losing a toy or moving to a new neighborhood to the death of a pet or even a beloved grand

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Jun 23, 2017
2 min

Helping Children Deal with Loss

Question In the last six months we’ve had loss of a grandmother, an uncle, and a close family friend. These have impacted our entire family, and especially our three young children. Any suggestions as to how we can help our kids deal with these losses? Answer Dealing with the inevitable losses of life provides parents with significant challenges and opportunities. Situations like this can be an opportunity for you model the difference that our Lord can make in the midst of

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Feb 1, 2017
3 min

How to Manage Stress Better

Stress is the “wear and tear” our bodies experience as we adjust to our continually changing environment; it has physical and emotional effects on us and can create positive or negative feelings. As a positive influence, stress can help compel us to action; it can result in a new awareness and an exciting new perspective. As a negative influence, it can result in feelings of distrust, rejection, anger, and depression, which in turn can lead to health problems such as headache

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Jan 24, 2017
2 min

Developing Perseverance in Kids

Question Our eight-year-old son gets discouraged very easily gives up. He won’t stay at a task long enough to learn how to do it. Sometimes he won’t even try to do something new while his older brother will try anything. How can I encourage him not to give up? Answer From learning how to ride a bike to swimming to jumping off of a diving board there are lots of opportunities for failure and success in growing up. Some kids thrive on these opportunities and others are frig

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Dec 23, 2016
3 min

Developing A Healthy Body Image

Question I’m concerned that my daughter has a negative body image and that it’s having a negative impact on her relationships and her school performance. How can I know of that’s a problem and if so how can I help her build a positive body image? Answer If you daughter is often critical about specific parts of her body (i.e. my hips are too big, my nose is funny, my hair never looks right), if she wears baggy, concealing clothing, if she avoids dressing for gym because she d

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